Friday 16 October 2015

5 THINGS: I said I wouldnt do as a parent...but did...

During those last (blissful) weeks of pregnancy, when I was on maternity leave and enjoyed pootling around the house preparing for our baby to be born, I thought long and hard about what kind of parent I wanted to be. Of course I wanted to do the best for our daughter and be the best parent I could be. Only problem
What does the 'best parent' look like? As the oh so common saying goes - there's no guide to parenting. I, like a lot of parent's to be, thought about the things I didn't want to do as a parent. Probably more so than the things I did want to do strangely enough. Below are the five things I said I'd never do as a parent but have done within the first 4 months!

1) Let Isabella sleep on me - The NHS in the UK warn you against co-sleeping so much, the horror stories the midwives and health visitors told us were enough to put me off co-sleeping for life. But we were also taught how to co-sleep safely on our NCT course, so we had both sides. We decided that it probably wasn't for us, as my husband sleeps so deeply and I didn't want the pressure all on me. However when Isabella was first born she wouldn't sleep in her moses basket, so we had no other choice than to co-sleep. I barely slept through worrying but at least Isabella did! We rarely do it nowadays as she's just so big and heavy, but I can certainly see the benefits if done safely.

2) Play/sing nursery rhymes all of the time - I had seen and heard parents playing nursery rhymes on repeat in their car or in a bid to get their child to sleep and I always thought to myself - no way. No way am I going crazy listening to nursery rhymes on repeat! Yet on a daily basis I find myself singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star on repeat, as it's Isabella's favourite song. I'll sing it while making breakfast/lunch/dinner, while I'm getting ready in the morning, while I'm getting Isabella ready. I'll shout it from the toilet as I try to entertain her from a distance. I'll sing at the top of my voice in the car when Isabella is crying. It's non stop and hard work but it soothes my daughter, so I don't care - I'll sing all day and night!

3) Give Isabella a dummy/soother - I wasn't anti dummies, in fact as someone who used to suck their thumb I would have preferred Isabella to want a dummy to soothe herself rather than her thumb which we can't take away when she's older. I just didn't want a dummy to interfere with breastfeeding, so was worried about introducing one. We tried Isabella with one once or twice and she wasn't keen on it. She's just one of those children who will not take to a dummy and that's okay.

4) Eat unhealthy food - I really want Isabella to eat well, so I thought that if I never eat anything unhealthy in front of her she'll never know it exists. Who was I kidding?! There's also the fact that Isabella hasn't got a clue what food even is yet, as she's not eating food herself yet! So putting pressure on myself to only eat healthy food 100% of the time is not only unrealistic but also unnecessary right now. I aim to bring Isabella up on a healthy, balanced diet and I hope to model that through what I eat but who am I kidding if I think that means no more chocolate for the next 18 years?!

5) Leave the house with sick on my clothes - Obviously babies are sick sometimes but I thought I'd never be that Mummy who leaves the house with it down their clothes. I was wrong, very wrong. Almost everyday I leave the house with faint white marks all over me where I've tried to wipe away the trail of sick Isabella has oh so kindly marked me with. You know what? I don't have time to care about it or what other people must think of me - I'll proudly wear my daughters sick if that means she's happy.

What I've learnt from becoming a parent is that you shouldn't put pressure on yourself - just go with the flow because after all you know what's best for your children. Better than anyone else.

Did you do anything you thought you wouldn't as a parent?

Feel free to leave me a comment :)

Helen x
You Baby Me MummyBinky Linky


  1. Haha soooo true!! We do what works dont we? I always said I'd never co-sleep, I didn't with my eldest and turned my nose up at anyone that did. Until I had my youngest... I ended up co-sleeping for a good 6 months!!! lol #binkylinky

  2. I too had all these ideas when I was pregnant. The reality is so different when baby arrives though right? we never co-slept as I have insomnia so i think it would have been me keeping my daughter up rather than the other way round, but I definitely let her sleep on me in the day. But I think if it's done safely what's the harm! As for dummies I actually did stick to that one and didn't give her a dummy so yay for that. So many other things have happened that I swore wouldn't but i think you just have to go with flow! we are all trying our best and thats what matters.

  3. Hahaha i was the same. I think we all want to be the perfect parent but when the children arrive we soon learn that there's no such thing and that's perfectly okay! As long as our children are fed, healthy and happy.. we are doing a good job! :)

  4. Ha! Yep, I can relate. And the NHS is sooooooo anti co-sleeping, isn't it? Even midwives who told me to break rules and trust my instincts warned me it would basically kill my baby. Well, it hasn't yet...

    As for never eating unhealthy food in front of her, I don't want her growing up thinking eating is something to be controlled (or full of rules to rebel against); I want her to learn how to find a balance. Let's see how that goes...

    I also said I'd stop typing blog comments the moment she woke up but she's totally sitting on my lap right now, watching this.

  5. Great post! All parents to young babies seem to have faint sick marks on them, its almost like a badge of honour lol :) #binkylinky

  6. Great post! It doesn't really matter what other people say and advice, what matters is how we look after and care for our own kids coz we're the only ones that knows best for our own kids. I couldn't imagine removing snot from my kids noses but I did, lol #binkylinky

  7. Oh theres so many things I never thought I'd do as a parent!! I always said I didn't want to plonk my child in front of the TV while I get stuff done...but I soon learnt that I would never get anything done if CBeebies didn't exist!!! xx #binkylinky

  8. I was going to be the perfect parent. It, er, didn't quite happen... Marianna watches TV, eats crisps, sometimes wears a sleepsuit all day, and had a dummy. I still kid myself I will metamorphosis into a textbook mum every time we move onto the next development stage though! :D #binkylinky

  9. Great post loved reading it I think we all do this thanks for linking to the binkylinky

  10. Great post - all our ideas of what kind of parent we will be go out the window when they are actually here! #binkylinky xx

  11. Yup, yup and yup! I think I said most of these too, but ended up doing them all anyway! Thanks for linking up to the #BinkyLinky

  12. :) I'm definitely all for guidelines rather than absolutes.

  13. Oh I am with you on this. I thought I wouldn't do so many things yet I do all of them daily! Thanks for linking up to #TheList x


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