How do you feel during the week running up to your wedding?
How are you meant to feel?
Are you meant to be excited?
Or nervous?
Or scared?
Or worried?
Or happy?
Or stressed?
These are just a couple of thoughts that have been running through my head recently. As we now have less than 6 months until we get married, it's all seeming a lot more real/scary/stressful/fun/exciting/ - the anticipation is almost too much some days. But this is paired with the slight feeling of dread - not because I don't want to marry Tom, I love him so much and I can't wait to marry him - but because I don't want it to be over. Up until this point in my life (I've had a very normal life - primary school, secondary school, sixth form, university, part time work and now full time work) there hasn't really been anything I'm only ever going to get a chance to do once. I only plan to get married once - to Tom. I won't ever go through the process of planning a wedding again, or the excitement of be proposed to, or the stress of organising everything and hoping with every bone in my body it comes together like the image in my head. That's a challenge in itself because despite how much talking Tom and I do about the wedding we still don't have quite the same image. I'm partially glad of that, I want us both to put our own marks on our wedding but it can make the simplest decisions a bit harder and time consuming. For instance, only yesterday we went out to buy some card for our RSVP's (we're making our own invitations). I thought I knew what we were doing and Tom thought he knew, however while I heading to the postcard sized card, Tom was heading to the A4 card size. I just presumed (something I'd recommend you don't do when it comes to planning your wedding, as I'm finding out) that as we were sending out postcard sized RSVP's we'd buy that size card but Tom made the very good point that it would be more of a challenge to print onto postcard size. So instead we should print on to A4 size and then cut them into postcard size - it makes complete sense. Just one example of how there can easily be crossed wires.
Again, up until this point in my life I've never had to make SO many decisions with someone else. My parents have always been there to guide me but generally I've made decisions for myself and by myself.
Weddings aren't about 'myself' they are about 'ourselves'.
I am known for having quite strong opinions, in fact I have an opinion on all of the big life decisions I've ever had to make. So some people that know me might have thought I would be a Bridezilla who would very much lead the decision making and it would be MY wedding. It's been completely the opposite, which I knew it would be, Tom and I are equals. We both share ideas, one of us doesn't shout louder than the other, we are fair and listen. This has been an important aspect of our ever growing relationship, so why would this change when it came to planning OUR wedding? It wouldn't and hasn't. We both value each others opinions and through a lot of discussions and conversations we finally make decisions about where we want this wedding of ours to go. Luckily, most of the time we are both on the same page - we both wanted a tipi wedding, for it to be rustic/vintage, pretty casual and to not have all of the traditions weddings usually involve. We are making the perfect partnership for planning our wedding, which bodes well for the rest of our life and I for one can't wait!
Do you think planning a wedding should be a joint venture?
Feel free to leave a comment - I love reading every single one :)
I never really had the whole planning or at least the time to plan a wedding because of having to do it within 3 months of entering the US due to my visa. But to be honest, that's the way I wanted it. I think having more time i'd of been too stressed. And for us, the small, barely organised wedding suited us, we had 7 people there (including us) and we had a meal afterwards at a posh Italian restaurant. I've never had any regrets about doing it that way, and for me keeping it small I think kept it to the meaning of the day. It was about us, about getting married and being together. I certainly think both sides should be involved in the planning process for sure.
ReplyDeleteGood luck with your planning!
Sounds perfect. My other half works away a lot so the planning has been left to me, just for ease of planning but I always ask his opinions and we swap ideas! I've been making a lot myself so I think he's glad I haven't dragged him into that! Haha! Good luck for your big day!
ReplyDeleteHey! Ooh loving all your picture inspiration. I'm like ooh, ooh at every one ha ha! It sounds like we have some similar ideas to be fair. We are having some vintage touches in our wedding and it's going to be relaxed and casual, not necessarily traditional either. LOVE your tipi idea, sounds amazing! Not long for you then with less than 6 months to go. I hope all your organising goes well hun :). I totally agree with what you say, Si likes to have his input, but I'm a little bit more creative and he will help me out when I need it but it's me who comes up with the ideas really. He just wants me to be happy with everything we choose, so I'm doing the majority of the organising but he will help me out, come shopping with me etc when it needs to be done :).
ReplyDeleteGem xx
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I think planning your wedding should absolutely be a joint venture. I am constantly asking N for his opinion on things like colour schemes and menus, which I think he does find a bit annoying, but I really didn't want to be one of those brides who basically told her OH to 'buy a suit and show up' so think I've gone the opposite way! He's quite relaxed about letting me get on with it but equally when I'm getting stressed about things he's been great about helping me make decisions.
ReplyDeleteLovely photo inspiration by the way, I love the candles on the tree stumps and the roses in teacups!