Thursday 30 April 2015

MOTHER: How do you know what is best?

When we found out we were expecting our first baby I hadn't anticipated the changes in which others interact with me.

Stroking my tummy without being invited somehow became okay,
Asking when/how we conceived our child somehow became okay,
Asking constantly about personal choices like whether we're going to find out the gender of our baby somehow became okay,
Then frowning upon YOUR choice or decision somehow became okay,
 Whilst sharing every piece of unwanted advice with you somehow became okay,
Insisting you breastfeed because 'breast is best' somehow became okay,
Reeling off the negatives of giving your child a dummy somehow became okay.

I know that everyone has an opinion, that's fine. But when your about to become parents (or already are parents) you are constantly bombarded with advice/opinions/pressure - it can all get a bit too much! I'm naturally a worrier, it's in my nature, so being faced with all of this helpful advice has become very overwhelming at times. How am I supposed to know what is best for our baby? What is best for US?

Midwives, family members, couples at antenatal classes, work colleagues, friends, even the next door neighbour will have invaluable pieces of advice for you. Talking about raising children seems to be a discussion that everyone likes to get involved in, everyone has an opinion on what is best. As someone who is a new parent, this terrifies me. I don't want to ignore all of the advice - after all Mum's have been there and know what to expect.

Parenthood is new world for us at the moment. But at the same time our decisions aren't going to please everyone, yet somehow I do feel a certain pressure to try and please everyone. A pressure I wish I didn't feel and it makes me upset that I do. I know we should just ignore everyone else and go with what is best for us, but how do I know what's best? We are on the learning journey every new parent goes on and that excites me just as much as it scares me. I think that's natural, parenthood is life changing after all.

Has anyone else felt like this?

Feel free to share your experiences below!

Helen x 

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